A story of Hope
Mike and Mary O’Conner are originally from Dublin, Ireland. They’ve both experienced the depths of disaster and the heights of happiness. For the first time, Mike and Mary’s story is told - exclusively for this website.
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Mike and Mary O’Conner were both born in Dublin, Ireland. They first met when Mike’s family moved into the house next door to Mary’s when they were just kids. From the day they met, they became childhood sweethearts. Mike is from a family of seven and Mary from a family of ten.
But when Mary was 9 years old, her father died of cancer. He was only 40 when he passed away. The grief was made all the worse shortly afterwards by the tragic death of Mary’s baby sister who was just 11 months old. The family went through indescribable turmoil. A couple of years later, Mary’s family left Ireland to begin a new life in England.
Years later, Mike also moved to Manchester, England to live with his older brother Tim. Tim was dating Mary’s sister Alice at the time. One night, Tim and Alice invited Mike and Mary to join them on a night out. At this time, Mary was 15 and Mike was 17. This was the first they’d seen each other in a long time. But from that night, they fell deeply in love and were almost inseparable.
Two years later on 8th August 1970 when Mary was 17 and Mike was 19, they got married. It wasn’t long before Mary had her first child, Stephen – soon followed by her second, Mark.
But life was tough. There was very little money in those early days and the financial pressures put strains on their marriage. The little flat where they lived was cramped and not the easiest of places to live. So they both worked hard and saved up enough money to move to a better home in a different area.
After 8 years of marriage, Mike and Mary were doing well materially. While they weren’t overly well off – they were not short of finances either. But it was around this time that their marriage began to go badly wrong. Rows and disagreements grew into hurts which developed into disappointments and finally into separation. They tried again and again to get back together but it never worked and finally in 1978, they divorced.
Mike and Mary both went on to live completely separate lives, only seeing each other when the children were involved. Otherwise, their paths never crossed.
Both got new partners, although they never re-married. They also engaged in busy social lives, partying and living for the moment. But still, there was a sense of emptiness and sadness in both Mike and Mary. The party lifestyle was in many ways an attempt to compensate for the feelings of hurt and loneliness both of them had.
Two years after the divorce, something significant happened to Mike that literally changed his life. Mike’s brother John became a Christian – and Mike was impressed with the difference he’d seen in him. So he too decided that he would enter into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
One day, when Mike was collecting the kids from Mary’s house, he informed her of his decision to become a Christian. At first, Mary was very sceptical. However, over a period of time, Mary observed the genuine difference there was in Mike’s life. He wasn’t getting drunk and living recklessly anymore – and he had an indescribable peace about him that he’d never had before.
Every time they saw each other again, Mike and Mary engaged in conversation about God, though they never had any intentions of getting back together again. But after a number of months, Mary too decided to put her trust in Jesus at a church event she attended. This decision had an enormously positive effect on her life. The feeling of emptiness she’d had for so long wasn’t there any more.
From that point on, Mike and Mary began to attend the same church. Over a period of three months, both Mike and Mary strongly felt that God didn’t want them to be divorced anymore. It was as if God had put a new love in each others hearts. With Gods help, all the hurts and disappointments they’d had were healed – and they fell deeply in love again, even deeper than they’d ever been before.
On the 8th August 1981 (the same date on which they were first married in 1970), Mike and Mary O’Conner got married all over again, three years after they were divorced. But this time, everything was different. God was the pillar of their relationship – and has been right up to this day!
Today, Mike and Mary lead a growing Church in Manchester. Their story brings hope and optimism to everyone they come into contact with.
Mary says, “I don’t know where we would be today if we hadn’t made that decision to follow Jesus. It was the best decision I have ever made in my life”
Mike says “Some people ask me, ‘how do you know what you’ve got is real?’. ‘How do you know that there is a real God?’ I answer from my experience - I know he’s real because he changed my life. He has given me purpose and real meaning. He has put His love in my heart.”
Mike and Mary have been married now for a total of 34 years and their marriage just gets stronger everyday. They’ve learnt how to adapt and God has given them a love for each other that has surpassed all their expectations. They continue to grow in faithfulness to God and each other. Where disappointment and hurt once ruled – now God’s grace is what motivates their lives.
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© Roy Todd, 2008.
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