Questions

Most hard working people get stressed from time to time. But some stress is unnecessary and
avoidable. Roy Todd asks a number of pertinent questions that may well help you avoid a down-
ward spiral of pointless stress.

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So you want to avoid stress?

Life is fast…and getting faster. Can you imagine what it would be like without the internet, emails or cell phones? We just couldn’t cope! And what about the incredible modes of transport we have. 100 years ago, the concept of traveling by car was unimaginable in most people’s minds. But today, just about everybody has one – and couldn’t do without it. And by the looks of things, the geeks in science labs are coming up with a billion and one more gadgets that will all make life even faster and apparently easier in the future. I recently read that by 2050, a plane will finally be developed that will be able to fly from London to Sydney in around 2 hours! Wow…no more stop-overs in Malaysia or Singapore.
Think about it…one day, a generation will look back to today and wonder how we coped with flights that took over 24 hours to complete the same journey!

But despite all our technological advances that are supposed to make life easier, the truth is that people have never been so stressed. A recent study concluded that every working day in the UK, 300,000 people are off work due to stress related illness. The average UK worker is absent nine days per year because of it. No-matter what gadgets are developed that make life more convenient – stress is a condition of the heart and mind.

Here are some questions you really ought to think about that may well help you avoid the downward spiral…

1. Are you busy or fruitful?

Some think that being busy and fruitful are exactly the same - they're not! It's possible to be busy doing lots of things and in the end, achieve nothing - like a soccer team that has 11 goalkeepers in it. Sure, they’ll be very busy. But in the end, nothing will be achieved. At best, they will maintain the status quo. At worst, they’ll concede goals.

God is looking for fruitfulness more than busyness. That’s not to say we should avoid hard work…far from it. But remember…anything that God wants us involved in always produces fruit. Of course, that fruit rarely comes instantly. It takes time to develop and ripen. But it’s through a process of patient planting and steady growth that God not only works in us – but through us too.

Take Thomas Edison for example. After attempting over 900 times to invent the light bulb, a "friend" approached him and advised that after 900 failed attempts, it might be time to quit. Edison replied, "I haven't failed 900 times - I've just found 900 ways how not to make a light bulb!" Shortly after that, he invented the light bulb.

Jesus once said: "Every good tree bears good fruit and every bad tree bears bad fruit" (Mt 7:17). God has called you to produce good fruit. Are you simply being busy or are you really being fruitful?

2. Are you saying “yes” when it really ought to be “no”?

What is it that God wants you to do? Well…are you doing it? Maybe that’s sounds a bit over-simplistic – but then again perhaps it’s not. My friend J John says “There is only enough time to do the will of God.” Think about it. If that’s true, then what are you saying “yes” to when you really ought to be saying “no”? I suspect saying “yes” too much is a huge factor in a lot of people’s stress levels.

A few years ago, I went through a really difficult period in ministry. To be honest, I lost my way a bit. During that time, I remember being the guest speaker at a fantastic church. Shortly afterwards, I was flattered to receive an invitation to be the senior leader of the same church. At first I was tempted. After all, they’re a great bunch of people who meet in a fabulous building with great office space, a highly gifted leadership team and all in all massive potential. In the midst of a challenging time, I thought that perhaps this was the answer to my problems. But having thought and prayed about, I knew deep in my heart that the answer was ‘no’. It’s not that I couldn’t do it – but more to do with the fact that I knew I shouldn’t do it. It wasn’t Gods mandate for my life. I’m sure my decision saved me a whole lot of stress. From that point, God began to open many more doors.

I think that if the Devil can’t knock you down – then he’ll try and lift you up by feeding your ego. Remember how he tempted Jesus at his weakest point? (Luke4:5-8). After leading him to a “high place” and showing him all the kingdoms of the world, he said “If you worship me, it will all be yours”. Jesus replied “It is written: “Worship the Lord your God and serve him only”. A definitive NO if ever there was one!

Have the courage to say “No” when you know something will distract you from what God wants for your life. Maybe there will be a bit of short-term pain. But you’ll save you’re a whole lot of hassle in the long-term and ultimately stay on course with God’s plan for your life.

3. Are you stressed or at rest?

I'm a big believer in divine healing. But, I'm also convinced that God wants us to be healthy! Here are three reasons why stress really isn’t helpful to us:

Physical effects include fatigue, headaches, bowel problems, high blood pressure, aches and pains, skin disorders, muscle tension and heart attacks
Mental effects include reduced concentration, loss of creativity, sleeplessness, inability to apply new information and an inability to adapt to change
Emotional effects include depression, anxiety, frustration, panic attacks, low self esteem, loss of confidence and inability to relax

Being overly stressed actually becomes a hindrance in our pursuit of the purpose of God. Are you over-stressed? If so, why? Remember the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:28: "Come to me you who are burdened and I will give you rest". The worst thing you can possibly do is to keep your problems to yourself. God actually wants to give you rest. Hebrews 4 talks about a "Sabbath rest for the people of God".

Paul says in Philippians 4:11 "I have learned to be content in all circumstances". In other words, whatever circumstances came Paul's way, he trusted God because he knew that God is above his circumstances. Don't let your circumstances master you - be the master of your circumstances!

4. Are you blessed or depressed?

For some people, depression is a very real problem. It often can’t be explained and it would be wrong just to give a glib sound-bite that dismisses it offhand.

But whatever your circumstances, you can be blessed. How? It’s to do having a willingness to bless others. Try it…it really works! Jesus said “It is more blessed to give than receive” (Acts20:35). The secret to living a happier life is not in getting what you want all the time – but in selflessness.

Remember, generosity isn’t about how much you have – but how much you give of what you have.
When I was in India a few years ago, I spoke at a church in a very deprived area. But in the midst of grotesque poverty, the people in there were incredibly happy. After the service, it was my intention to give a financial gift to the church. But I was amazed at their refusal to accept it. Instead, they presented me with 1000 rupees – a lot to them. At first, I felt incredibly embarrassed, even disappointed at not being able to give. But then I realized what was happening. Even in dreadful circumstances, these people had learned that the secret of true happiness is in giving.

Some people have a ‘take take take’ attitude. And then they wonder why life is so miserable. It’s because they haven’t learnt the secret of giving! Interestingly, extensive research by the University of Michigan has suggested that “making a contribution to the lives of other people may help extend the length of our own lives.”

5. Are you enduring life or enjoying it?

I’ve met people in life who constantly moan and groan. In fact they’re so used to complaining that they’ve turned it into an art form. So…ok…we all have a moan from time to time. But all the time? Give me a break.

You see…often the circumstances we face aren’t the real problem. How we handle them is the issue! We need to get some perspective and realise that some stuff in life just isn’t worth getting stressed about. Too often, people get all hyped up over petty things that don’t even matter that much anyway. I’ve rarely heard of a church being divided over doctrinal matters. However, I have heard of churches falling apart because of silly clashes between head-strong personalities who are so full of stinking pride that neither is prepared to give way to the other.

I visited Pakistan last year. It was a very humbling experience. I spoke to many Christians who are under constant threat of persecution. Yet not once did I hear anyone complain. On the contrary – these people are grace-filled and encouraging. I’m fully aware they’re not perfect – but what I saw was a bunch of people who have made a decision to enjoy life even though they are under terrible threat.
God actually wants you to enjoy the journey - bumps and all! Sometimes it is a good thing to be happy even when it doesn't make any sense. In Acts 5, the apostles were horrifically beaten for preaching the Gospel. However, it says in Acts 5:41, "The apostles left the Sanhedrin rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Lord's name!"
Attitude means everything. Are you enduring or enjoying?

6. Are you peaceful or petrified?

There are two types of fear:

A healthy fear: this is a respect that protects us - "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom" (Proverbs 9:10)
An unhealthy fear: this is a wrong perspective that can destroy us – i.e. Fear of people, future, failure, leaving home, etc.

Harry Truman once said, "The only thing to fear is fear itself". The Bible says, "God has not given us a spirit of fear but of love, power and a sound mind."

What are your fears? Identify them and determine to surrender them to Jesus. Don't spend all your time living in fear. Do what the book says, "Feel the fear and do it anyway!"

Listen to Philippians 4:6-7:
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."

It’s ok to feel fear. Just don’t submit to it. Surrender to God instead. It’s then that you’ll experience true peace in your heart – know that everything is fine because God is in control.

7. Are you burning on or burning out?

God will never take us beyond where we can go. He wants us to be "on fire" but not burning out! In Exodus 3, Moses noticed a burning bush. Experts say it was common for bush fires to occur in the "far side" of the desert where he was. But there was something about the bush in Exodus 3 that caught Moses attention. It burned but it wasn't consumed (Ex 3:2). It was consistently on fire, burning on but not burning out. Consistency always catches people's attention!

Some of John Wesley's students once approached him and asked how they might attract the crowds like he did. Wesley said, "Get on fire and stay on fire and the people will come and watch you burn."
It's important to have a fresh experience with God every day; otherwise we serve out of duty instead of passion.

One day, we may have to die for the Kingdom but nowhere in the Bible are we taught to burn ourselves out. Are you burning on or burning out?

8. How much time do you spend at the vine?

Jesus says in John 15:5, "I am the vine and you are the branches". The only way we can continually produce good fruit is when we continually feed off the vine. The only way we will live productive and effective lives is when we spend time with Jesus.

In Luke 10, Martha was so busy getting things right in the kitchen that she missed the whole point of a very important day - the guest (Jesus) had arrived! But her sister Mary made the right decision, even though she should have been more courteous and informed Martha of her intentions of spending as much time as possible with Jesus. However, Jesus didn't harshly rebuke Martha. He graciously speaks to her "... you are worried and concerned about many things but Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her" (v41-42).

The Challenge?

Have a look at those areas of your life that distract you from the will of God. Determine to surrender them to Jesus and make your relationship with Him top priority. Over and above everything else, the thing that's going to make you effective as a Christian is how connected you are to Jesus. That connectedness will prove a strong foundation for your life – helping you stay emotionally balanced and avoiding unnecessary stress.

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Roy Todd